{"product_id":"trolley-problem-womens-tee","title":"Trolley Problem Women's Tee","description":"\u003ch2\u003eThe Lore\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMashup perfection from the \u003cstrong\u003elate 2010s\u003c\/strong\u003e when \"Are Ya Winning Son?\" collided with Philosophy 101 coursework. The crude MS Paint aesthetic and fedora-wearing dad peering through that doorway outline triggers instant recognition (peak boomer meme meets ethical paralysis). Wearing this proves you survived the era when every gaming moment became existential crisis content. For those who remember when trolley problems weren't just thought experiments but actual Discord server debates at 3am.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Specs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBase:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eStanley\/Stella SATW002\u003c\/strong\u003e is Europe's top ethical blank with GOTS-certified organic cotton and a refined drape that feels quietly expensive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Midweight 180 GSM (5.30 oz) 100% organic combed ring-spun cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrint Tech:\u003c\/strong\u003e Kornit NeoPigment™ DTG—Oeko-Tex® certified eco-inks are jetted directly into the fabric fibers, creating a soft, retail-grade print that withstands repeated washing without heavy buildup.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFeel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Ink settles soft into organic fibers like philosophical weight settling into everyday conversation. Hangs with the relaxed confidence of someone who finds ethical dilemmas genuinely hilarious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Regular fit with set-in sleeves and ribbed collar. 100% GOTS-certified organic cotton. Runs slightly large—consider sizing down for EU customers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Trust\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGOTS Certified\u003c\/strong\u003e · OCS Certified · Eco-Certified Inks · \u003cstrong\u003eSweatshop-Free Production (US\/EU)\u003c\/strong\u003e · Made-to-Order (Zero Overproduction)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRating:\u003c\/strong\u003e PG · Absurdist · Family Safe\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVisual Accessibility:\u003c\/strong\u003e A crude, low-fidelity sketch style (think early digital paint programs) defines this humorous internet culture mashup in high-contrast jet black on bright white. The famous \"Are Ya Winning, Son?\" dad peers in on a distressed son operating the lever of the classic Trolley Problem ethical dilemma. Instead of a high score, the panic-stricken response reads \"I DON'T KNOW DAD I GENUINELY DON'T KNOW.\"\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shirtwascash","offers":[{"title":"Lavender \/ S","offer_id":47972392698034,"sku":"ojv1788074363649","price":20.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ M","offer_id":47972392730802,"sku":"eoa1788074363650","price":20.07,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ L","offer_id":47972392763570,"sku":"mrp1788074363651","price":19.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ XL","offer_id":47972392796338,"sku":"djn1788074363652","price":17.97,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ 2XL","offer_id":47972392829106,"sku":"etj1788074363653","price":23.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":47972392861874,"sku":"aqs1788074363654","price":23.96,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":47972392894642,"sku":"aec1788074363655","price":21.86,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":47972392927410,"sku":"rfd1788074363656","price":20.07,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":47972392960178,"sku":"tds1788074363657","price":23.66,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":47972392992946,"sku":"pcp1788074363658","price":24.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0708\/2419\/8322\/files\/trolley-problem-womens-tee_1.jpg?v=1788074368","url":"https:\/\/www.riverandroot.shop\/products\/trolley-problem-womens-tee","provider":"My Store","version":"1.0","type":"link"}